... My baby is sick. He must have a sore throat or an ear ache - something that makes him wake up and scream as soon as I lie him down in his crib. After unhappily waking from a five-minute morning nap and then again after a half-hour afternoon nap, I pulled him into bed with me and he presented me with the luxury of holding him as he slept a bit more. I laid there studying his tiny hands, one little fist curled against his cheek, and feeling the warmth of his head fitted into the curve of my neck in such a way that could have been designed only by God Himself, and listening to his snuffly little breaths and soft sucking noises as his mouth worked busily, sucking at nothing but air and memories of sweet comfort. I'm sorry he's sick, but he really is delightful like this.
... Our cat delivered five kittens yesterday, and this time, Elisabeth and Rachael were able to watch her give birth. In fact, she chose to deliver right in Elisabeth's bedroom. I'll have to post pictures soon. Three girls and two boys in a variety of patterns and colors. The kids have already named and claimed the black one (Midnight, it is) in spite of Daddy's strict order that we are NOT keeping another kitten. I am still amazed by the entire birthing miracle, whether human or feline. How could anyone not laugh in scorn at the very idea of evolution?
... Bowling alleys make me hum. Seriously. I hum a lot of the time already, but particularly in noisy places. Like in the car, in crowds of people, at parties, in the church foyer after service. Anytime there is a lot of noise, I catch myself humming. And I tend to hum unidentified tunes over and over and over until I drive myself crazy if I'm paying attention. Which I'm usually not. But tonight, I had to laugh when I realized I was humming the Wheel of Fortune song they play at the end of the show.
Dum, dum, dum, dum...dum,dum,dum...Dum,dum,dum,dum..dum,de,dum,de,dum,dum..... You know that one, too? Come to think of it, maybe that's Jeopardy. Hmm, it's been so many years since I've watched it. But anyway, after I was getting a bit annoyed over having that particular tune stuck in my mind, I suddenly realized that I had switched to a new one and that this time I was humming, "People Need the Lord." Maybe I'm better off just not paying attention at all. And it
is a better habit than say, picking my nose or biting my fingernails in public, right? Hey, at least it's a
happy kind of habit.
... I'm still working on my "
Just an Ordinary Day" post, which will, without a doubt, be my longest blog post ever, but I just couldn't bear to leave anything out. And after recording it, I am fully convinced that I must have the most wonderful life ever.
... Years ago, as a young girl, I checked a book out of the library that changed my view of writing forever. For many years I have been unable to recall the exact title, but just a few days ago, I woke up and it came to me - for no reason, out of nowhere - and when I looked it up online, I discovered that the book is now out of print. However... there is a free online copy available. I cannot wait to read it once again and remember exactly what it was about and exactly why it lit my fire. It is called "
Be Not Pale, Beloved Snail." Anything with a title like that
must be creative, wouldn't you think?
... I like myself today. Do you know how many days that I don't like me? Far too many. But today I have decided to be myself without apology. Have you ever considered how it is that you can discover a kindred spirit, having never met in person, because someone is willing to share her passions and values and dreams in writing? And at the same time, how you can know someone your whole life, but never really understand who she really is or know what she is thinking? They say that actions speak louder than words, but sometimes words just cannot be acted out. I am thankful for blogs and for email.
... I may not like myself as much tomorrow. For a long time, now, I have been meaning to keep a daily record of my feelings, condensed into just one or two words. I know that I would see a pattern. Something that would explain or at the least, predict, why in one week, I am overflowing with more ideas than I could ever share, and then in the next, I am completely and totally braindead. On the third week, I am too tired to care, and on the fourth week, I have to work diligently at counting my blessings rather than focusing on my faults. Of course, it is not all this cut and dried, but the point is, I change. Drastically. And yet, the creative moments always return. Has anyone ever kept a record like this or are we women just too confusing and better off accepting ourselves as such?
... I am ever so thankful for my husband who, after years of considering myself a very stable person, makes me look like a pile of jello in an earthquake. He has a way of always steering me back to reality. Such an important thing for a dreamer such as I.
And now, I must leave you, my friend, in spite of the 237 other thoughts brimming in my mind. What a long nap, an evening out, and a Diet Pepsi won't do for a gal...
Much love,
